JC's Top 12 Winter Safety Tips!

Hi guys!

I noticed that some of you are getting snow and ice and freezing your butts off. Now that the novelty has worn off, you're probably really hating it. I bet you're wondering how we manage up here in Canada!

Welp. I want you to be safe and warm, so I put together a handy list of Winter Tips for you. I am nice.

1. If your kids are playing in the snow, check them often. Sometimes kids get stuck while burrowing in a snow fort. Danger!


2. Snow can be heavy, particularly if it has been ploughed into a pile. It's dangerous to burrow, because it might collapse on top of you, especially if children are playing on top.


3. If your car has been snowed in, clear the exhaust before you turn it on. Or the exhaust may back up into your car interior. The results can be deadly.


4. If you have to shovel snow, take it easy. The weight of snow can hurt your back and I've heard of people who have done a lot of digging sometimes have a heart episode the next day because of over straining. Shoveling snow can be strenuous exercise. Check this video out.


5. If you're walking down the street you should pay attention to icicles forming along the edges of roofs. Icicles have been known to fall onto the sidewalk below - a friend of mine was struck by one. It gave her some new ideas but she was not happy.


6. Ice storms can produce beautiful formations on trees and it's tempting to photograph them. But they can be heavy! Trees do shed heavy boughs covered in ice so please take care.


7. Driving: DO NOT use your car as a "coat". If you get stuck in the snow and have to walk to safety without a real coat, you'll be intensely cold. Also, keep a few blankets in your car....and a bucket. You never know.


8. Roads might not seem slippery, but ice can be invisible and patchy. This is known as "black ice" and it's a killer. Black ice and speed do not mix well. Brakes do not work on a slippery road. If you have to drive, you should reduce your speed. See Transport Canada for valuable winter driving safety tips.


9. Regular or "all season" tires can be pretty useless in snowy conditions. Especially true if the roads are neither cleared nor salted/sanded/graveled. Snow tires are essential for getting up and down hills. It's no fun at all to be that person spinning your wheels on a hill and going nowhere. The people behind you will honk at you.


10. We have these great things that I call "Crocodile Teeth", (which is a way better name than "folding steel traction aid", duh). If your car gets stuck, you put them under your wheel and the sharp teeth grip down into the surface so that your wheel can roll across the top. Totally great! But read the directions carefully: using these the wrong way can cause them to fling up into the air when the wheel spins. It can hit someone and really hurt them. And believe me, the last thing you want is to have to go to the ER when you're stuck in the snow.


11. Temperatures below -10°C can be dangerous if you're not dressed properly. In Montreal in can go down well below -24. This is seriously cold. Thermal underlayers are great for keeping warm and snow pants will keep you warmer too. You definitely need good mittens and warm, dry boots. Everything waterproof! Hats that cover your ears are best and a scarf to cover your face. I always tell my kids, "your nose doesn't grow back". Frostbite, frostnip and chilblains can happen! Read this.


12. Don't eat yellow snow.

BE CAREFUL. Have fun. Build a snowman. And repeat after me:

"Fuck is it cold!"

You're practically Canadian now.

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Summer SLEEVES.

My friend Tanya (jewelry designer extraordinaire at Gracie Mack) was recently lamenting on Facebook, about the lack of sleeves on cute summer dresses. Her idea was to open a shop called "We Have Sleeves".

I generally do okay with my body image (mostly by not looking in the mirror). But honestly, I do have things that bug me from time to time and glunky underarms around the bra line is one of them. Here's my peri-menopausal cartoon body (without the Jessica Rabbit treatment):

Glunkity-glunk!

A few other women jumped into Tanya's Facebook convo, and when photographer Sarah Thomas suggested "fake sleeves" a picture formed itself in my head.

Think about it: with SLEEVES we won't have to put on a sweater or jacket or shawl, so you don't have to worry about getting too hot. Also, your silky shoulders will be exposed for "come hither" posing over a strawberry daiquiri... or ALLCAPS cocktail.

We could have these in solid colours, light sheer fabric for summer and a little heavier for spring or fall. SLEEVES could be simple to integrate with any dress (Tanya suggests putty, charcoal gray, white and black). Or SLEEVES could be more decorative; beaded or with silk-flowers for example, to make a fashion statement.

Now we need someone to make these for us. Who else wants them?

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I draw YOU - Amiyrah Martin.

I met Four Hats And Frugal vlogger/blogger in person at Aiming Low's Non-Con12. She smiles easily and is smart and funny and really good with the whole having-a-fabulous-time-while-not-spending-money-thing. But it was her Halloween costume that made me fall in love with Amiyrah Martin.

She was the X-MISS - a super heroine who lost her family in a tragic tree-lighting accident, so she turned rogue and started to fight crime...but only during the Holiday Season. She had props and everything. She lifted up a bunch of bangles and shook them in my face, singing ominously, "Fiiiive goooolden riiiiiiings...!" I couldn't remember what the five golden rings were for, on account of being kinda tipsylaughing so hard. I had to ask her to remind me this afternoon on Facebook:

Me: "Hey. What were those five golden rings for?"

Amiyrah: "They were the rings of death, so mostly for dismemberment."

Me: "Jeeeeezus woman. Lol. I pity your enemies."

Amiyrah: "I have a lot of pent up anger and I project it all into my characters."

Scary. But clever. Oh, so clever.

Clearly there's more than meets the eye with this one. When I asked Amiyrah what her four hats were, she said this:

I'm like...dude, how do I draw that? I need hats that rep.

Being a frugalista with fashion sense, she wasted no time in giving me a list of her favorite four hats: "top hats, berets, baseball hats and those big floppy hats you wear to the beach".

I assigned them as follows:

But today is her birthday, so she needs a fifth hat:

Her mom made her this cake. (I mean the actual cake; I drew the cartoon version). It makes for excellent headgear.

You can totally cut these out and stick them on Amiyrah's head and they will fit. I am nice.

Happy Birthday Amiyrah!

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The Dare.

"Dad can you drive me to my friend's house please?"

"Sure, just let me get dressed." The Huz was wearing naught but his flip-flops and a sarong. For those who know not what a sarong is, it's a piece of pretty cloth wrapped around the waist and worn by men and women alike in South East Asia. Rather like a skirt. Yes, his nipples were showing.

So of course I said, "I dare you to go wearing that." He rolled his eyes and smiled, picked up the car keys and headed for the garage with the 12 year old boy in tow.

"I'm prolly going to tweet this!!!" I shouted after him. The Huz just laughed.

He had that evil twinkle. It reminded me of that thing he did with that bucket...

An hour later he came back and said he'd been to the shop on the way home to pick up some music equipment. The Huz asked them for a discount since he was only wearing a sarong. And they gave it to him. Oh yes they did. And he said they offered him a further 10% off if he was naked.

I dunno, I think he's making that last bit up....

I sat in my garden and drew this on my iPad, using Paper and a Wacom Bamboo stylus.

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The GALA.

On Sunday I got to go to Les Gemeaux Awards*.  I had no idea what to wear, so I called up my producer; she told me it was the event of the year! Great. No pressure there.
*Think "Emmys" but for French speaking Canada.

I dressed up as groovy as I could...and gazed up close at local celebs posing red carpet style for camera flashes. I saw some amazing shoes.

My show was nominated in two categories. As they were about to announce the winners, my producer whispered that I would have to join her onstage if we won. Pretty sure all the colour drained from my face at that point. I experienced a bizarre dichotomy of simultaneously hoping to both win and lose.

We didn't win...but it was such an honour just to be nominated. And being invited to the Gala was amazing. I had fun!
Congratulations to all the winners.

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The HOODY.

When I was four, my mom bought me a Kangaroo Shirt.

It was called that because it had a pouch to keep your hands warm. If you put the hood up, you were nice and cozy.

It was pale grey and soft, and I loved it.

In the last decade or so, the hoody has become legit baddass street fashion.
It's mainstream.

And if you put the hood up, a measure of anonymity is within reach. You can hide your face and hair colour.

CCTV surveillance cams are easily snubbed...and accountability evaporates.

Nowadays, a person wearing a hoody may cause a ripple of unease and fear, or prejudice against an innocent fashion conscious youth.

The 14 year old daughter took my 11 year old son out shopping for his back-to-school clothes today. They came back with a Kangaroo Shirt. It looks great on him, but I've made him promise to keep the hood down unless his head is cold.

I have worn hoodies for years. What do you think of them?

This is a thoughtful response to Youtube videos of the recent London riots and looting.

Share this moment.

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