October 23, 2012

The Tenth Floor TURD.

WARNING: Not for those who are easily flushturd.

This didn't actually happen. Well, okay, it did happen but not exactly.

Me and my friend Robin (known as #TheRobin on Twitter cuz she has yet to exist there) went to BlissDom Canada this weekend. We trained it from Montreal, and headed straight to the Sheraton Centre, located "in the vibrant core of downtown Toronto". Needless to say the long train ride had resulted in an urgent need to use the toilet for Number 1. Which we did as soon as we got checked into our hotel room.

But instead of flushing, the toilet did that horrifying thing with the water rising up threateningly to the brim of the toilet bowl...and then just staying there. Uh-oh!

The Robin called the front desk, and some poor unsuspecting maintenance man came up from house-keeping. He just stood there and stared at the toilet bowl. I was standing next to him thinking, wow, this is really embarrassing! But I love embarrassment, it's like, one of my favorite emotions.

Some of my best stories come from my ability to embrace embarrassment.

So the maintenance dude and I are staring silently at the toilet, full to the brim with pale yellow water. And a token bit of toilet paper floating sexily on top. Naturally it also smelled faintly of female pee.

Eventually he looks at me and says, "If I flush it, will it overflow?"

Seriously? How should I know? I shrugged and smiled. Anything could happen and I was hopeful.

He wisely decided not to try flushing it. Off he goes to get a plunger, tarum, tarum, tarum. And he unplugs the toilet. And later that same day it blocked up again. So he came back and unblocked it again.

Lucky for him, it was only ever Number 1. But that didn't stop me and The Robin imagining what it would be like if it was Number 2.

The Robin came up with the title for this blog post. You guys can thank her for that. And the Sheraton gets top marks for prompt toilet unblocking services.

Embarrassment might be one of my Super Powers.