The Animated Woman

Try not to miss me.

2012-02-28T00:02:00.000-05:00

House-sitters/dog-wranglers? Check. Passports? Check. White knuckles for fling on four different airplanes just to get from Montreal to a remote island in the Caribbean? Check.

Lovely people I'm going off grid for a little over a week. I'll be with my family and a gang of close friends celebrating life in general, my 50th birthday and 20 years of marriage to the man I love, otherwise known as The Huz.

If you miss me please feel free to whine and sniffle in the comments below.

I love you.

Yer pal forever,

JC

FUQMAN! Dance remix & music video.

2012-02-25T02:54:00.000-05:00

WARNING: This tune is kinda catchy.

Legitimize the "eff" word? FUQ YEAH! Here's the music video to FUQMAN, the short film I made a few weeks ago.

Irresistible grooves by The Huz. Put this in your playlist you crazy fuqqers.

The Evolution of SOCIAL MEDIA.

2012-02-23T15:12:00.000-05:00

Social media? The cavemen scratched it in the dirt with a stick...

...and now they scratch it on the net with a smartphone.

Gossip, evangelizing, sales, hatedom, fandom... though the media has changed, essentially the messages are all the same. And so many more people have access to it.

Whelp...I think I just drew a couple of neck-beards here.

The Podium ...again.

2012-02-20T17:22:00.000-05:00

I was invited to speak at a 'creative non-fiction' class at Marianopolis College today. The class and teacher were wonderful. They have no idea but I pretended to be 3 years old all the way.

This time I read a few funny selections from my blog with pictures and tied the whole thing together with the theme of empathy - in real life and social media.

I thought I might be really nervous like the last time, but it was cool. I didn't trip and fall or nothin'.

Froggy FRIDAY.

2012-02-17T13:42:00.000-05:00

I feel like a froggie leaping from Friday lily pad to Friday lily pad.

Some weeks the hang time is a little long. But I usually land with a splash.

The Outsider Parents Club.

2012-02-15T16:21:00.000-05:00

Whenever I come to these parent-teacher things at the kids' school, and I see other parents...I feel like an alien.

The other parents are all so familiar with each other. I often experience the same feeling when I try to engage with some online parenting communities and, dare I say it, mommy blog groups. I feel like an outsider. It kinda reminds me of high school...

Anybody else feel this way? I suspect that I don't have to start an Outsider Parents Club. It prolly already is.

Leap Year LOVE.

2012-02-14T09:00:00.020-05:00

I love you with all 366 of my hearts; one for every day of the year.

Happy Valentines Day ...every day!

Pickle Weasel February.

2012-02-11T22:53:00.001-05:00

That lovable scallywag Pickle Weasel is hi-jacking my cartoons again.

You can wait to see them month by month or be groovy and get the calendar.

The Stowaway.

2012-02-08T21:38:00.001-05:00

True story. I was walking down the street....

...minding my own business...

...when the unthinkable happened.

A stowaway revealed itself.

And it was flesh toned.

A lesser woman might cringe in horror...

...but if you are me, you do this:

Tell me about ~~your~~ I mean a friend of a friend's most embarrassing moment.

Please stumble!

PUSHING 50.

2012-02-06T23:37:00.002-05:00

Today is my birthday! And it's a BIG one, so I wanted to commemorate it with a little animation.

Yeah, I've been pushing 50 so hard it's staggering over backwards. Some of you may say, "wow, you're old". And some may say, "you don't look 50". And still others may say, "can I have some cake?"

But I say, "THIS IS WHAT 50 LOOKS LIKE, dammit." How old are you?

I love you MORE than beer.

2012-02-04T01:26:00.000-05:00

...continued from here.

"I love you more than Twitter!!"

No sooner had the words left my mouth, than The Huz appears at the boy's bedroom door. He looks at me surrounded by all three kids on the boy's bed and says, "did I hear correctly? You love us 'more than Twitter'?"

I nod solemnly. "I knew it! I knew it" yells the 11 year old boy bouncing up and down. "Dad! Dad! Tell us how much you love us?!" His teenaged sisters toss their hair and look annoyed.

The Huz thinks carefully. He strokes his chin and answers, "I love you more than coffee, more than tea, more than wine, more than bacon, more than chocolate, and definitely MORE than Twitter."

I roll my eyes, "yeah, yeah, but how much is that?"

And he says:

And here's the mug to prove it!

Get it NOW, for the one you love, cuz Valentine's Day is coming.

Love someone more than beer? I gots more love mugs in my Zazzle Shop.

This story is part of a short series that starts here.

I love you MORE than Twitter.

2012-02-03T00:23:00.000-05:00

It's bedtime. Both the 11 year old boy and his 14 year old sister stare at me in shock.

"You love us more than chocolate?!?" Hearing the word chocolate, the 17 year old daughter appears at the door. "Did someone say "chocolate"?" she asks.

The 14 year old pipes up, "yeah, apparently she love us more than coffee, more than tea, more than wine, more than bacon, and more than chocolate. Still don't know how much that is though."

The boy is squirming around on his bed as his sisters make themselves comfortable. He's getting all excited so he shouts "MOM how much do you love us?!?"

And I shout back:

And here's the mug to prove it.

Get it NOW, for the one you love, cuz Valentine's Day is coming.

Love someone more than bacon? I gots more love mugs in my Zazzle Shop. Oh and there's 25% off sale. Yay!

This story is part of a short series that starts here. Stay tooned to find out what happens next...

20 YEARS of LOVE.

2012-02-01T21:57:00.000-05:00

FUQ I love this man.

Twenty years ago today, I won the lottery of love and married him.

Another twenty years would be better than diamonds.

The PODIUM.

2012-01-31T22:12:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow I will amuse the world by stepping outside my comfort zone and into oncoming traffic. I will enter the Land Of Public Speaker-ing - 400 college students at a Humanities Symposium. Start me off on something easy, why don't you?

I've depicted myself as a toddler so I can be easily forgiven.

The Huz is bringing wet wipes and a fire extinguisher just in case the unthinkable happens. Wish me luck.

Meet STFU.

2012-01-30T01:53:00.001-05:00

Another valuable acronym. The kind you really want after watching WTF duke it out with OMG.

STFU stands for "shut the FUQ up." And if you want to know what FUQ stands for, go see this.

Pickle Weasel January.

2012-01-27T01:00:00.000-05:00

That loveable rascal Pickle Weasel is hi-jacking my blog posts again. This is from The Last Snowman.

You can wait to see them month by month or support your local bloggy-animator (me) and buy the calendar.

YEAH!

I Draw YOU - @xtremeparnthood

2012-01-25T20:13:00.000-05:00

Sunday Stilwell @xtremeparnthood hired me to redesign her Banshee and I loved every minute of it.

She's relaunched her blog Adventures in Extreme Parenthood and it looks gorgeous. Sunday's the frazzled mom of two autistic boys. In her own words the drawing "fully embodies how I feel most days chasing my boys around".

Gracious, smart and with a sense of humor. This woman is a pleasure to work with! It was easy to say YES to this job.

FUQMAN!

2012-01-23T21:14:00.000-05:00

WARNING: Parental discretion.

True story: our old zombie car wouldn't start....until it was actually being towed away. The lights came on and the engine roared, I kid you not. My husband raged, "The Lords Of Irony are at it again! Wreaking havoc in our lives!" And the idea for this superhero hit him in the face and knocked him flat. While he was recovering, I made this little film.

Irresistible grooves by The Huz himself. Cuz he's a mewzishun, yo.

Shall we do a dance remix? I'm thinking ...FUQYEAH!

I love you MORE than chocolate.

2012-01-23T12:49:00.000-05:00

The 11 year old boy sits up in his bed, his eyes wide. His 14 year old sister comes into the room saying, "Did I hear you right? You love him more than coffee, more than tea, more than wine, and even more than bacon?!? And what about me?" I smile, but I'm thinking hard.

The boy looks earnest. "Yeah mom... how much do you love me, I mean 'us'...?"

And I say:

And here's the mug to prove it.

Get it NOW, for the one you love, cuz Valentine's Day is coming!

Love someone more than bacon? I gots more love mugs in my Zazzle Shop. Oh and there's 15% off sale. Yay!

Do you play "how much do you love me?" games with your kids? This story is part of a short series that starts here. Stay tooned to find out what happens next...

I love you MORE than bacon.

2012-01-22T14:02:00.000-05:00

The boy giggles and squirms under his quilt. "Really mom? You love me more than coffee, more than tea and even more than wine?" I smile and nod, saying, "I truly do." And he says "But how much is that? How much do you love me...?"

And I say:

And here's the mug to prove it.

I love you MORE than wine.

2012-01-20T19:13:00.000-05:00

So my son puts his head back on his pillow and looks at me. He's getting a little sleepy now but he presses on "Okay mom, so you love me more than coffee, and you love me more than tea...but how much do you love me...?"

And I say:

And here's the mug to prove it.

Get it NOW, for the one you love, cuz Valentine's Day is coming!

Love someone more than chocolate? I gots more love mugs in my Zazzle Shop. Oh and there's 15% off sale. Yay!

I love these bedtime games with my kids. This story is part of a short series that starts here. Stay tooned to find out what happens next...

I love you MORE than tea.

2012-01-20T11:05:00.001-05:00

Tucked into his quilts, my son pulls me closer and whispers, "Mom, so you love me more than coffee...but how much do you love me...?"

And I say:

And here's the mug to prove it.

Get it NOW, for the one you love, cuz Valentine's Day is coming!

Love someone more than bacon? I gots more love mugs in my Zazzle Shop.

This story is part of a short series that starts here. Stay tooned to find out what happens next...

I love you MORE than coffee.

2012-01-19T12:00:00.002-05:00

At night, when I tuck the 11 year old boy into his bed, he pulls me close and whispers, "Mom, how much do you love me...?"

And I say:

And here's the mug to prove it.

Get it NOW, for the one you love, cuz Valentine's Day is coming!

Love someone more than beer? I gots more love mugs in my Zazzle Shop.

BLACKout.

2012-01-18T12:24:00.000-05:00

Don't be silenced, don't fall asleep.

I live in Canada, but if SOPA or PIPA goes down in the US, it'll impact my blog immediately. And then it's only a matter of time before Canada follows suit.

Use your voice. Take action here >>> End Piracy, Not Liberty.

Check out my new THREADS!

2012-01-14T01:28:00.002-05:00

It has been a monumental drag to not be able to reply directly to your comments on my drawings. Only last night I was hovering between installing either Disqus or Intense Debate, to enable threaded comments. Actually the only reason I didn't install one or the other was that I started having a real life intense debate with my brother on Facebook, and after that, I fell asleep.

But tonight...lo and behold! Blogger has added its own threaded comments. I can't draw a YAY big enough to show how pleased I am about this. Be satisfied with a dorky smile.

Go on, leave me a comment. And then I'll reply directly to you.

I can't wait.

Mission IMPOSSIBLE.

2012-01-12T15:25:00.001-05:00

Your mission, should you accept it, is to fit no less than FIVE (5) helpings of pasta into your tummy.

Dun, dun, dun-dun, dun, dun...

Dun-dun, dun, dun, dun-dun, dun, dun...

Tudleeooo.... tudleeooo.... tudleeooo.... tun-nun!

Dun! Dun! Dun-dun! Dun! Dun! Dun-dun!

Yeah, the 11 year old boy is growing again.
But where's he gonna fit that ice-cream?

NINJA Foot Massage.

2012-01-09T16:37:00.006-05:00

This is my older brother. For his birthday last year, we gave him a foot massage treat in Chinatown. Awesome. It took him a year to cash it in, due to him having a new baby, haha.

Me and The Huz went down there with him and had simultaneous foot massages. Those massage-therapists are amazing! They really beat the crap out of your feet, and they do all the ~~victims~~ patients in unison, like Kodo Drummers!

The Bro snored through the whole thing, prolly also due to him having a new baby.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY dude!

Best Christmas present EVAR.

2012-01-06T20:06:00.001-05:00

Guess what I got for Christmas!

I can't wait to see what you guys come up with.

What was your fave present?

9 Ways To Say NO.

2012-01-03T21:17:00.001-05:00

Are you tired of being ~~asked~~ expected to work for free? Here are nine ways to say NO.

1. The Demure Negatory. If you throw in a little something shiny, they won't even know what hit them.

2. Shock and Disbelief. Trust me, you won't even need to fake it.

3. Rage. No one will mistake this for a "yes".

4. The Element of Surprise. Catch them off guard with a Cirque move!

5. Run Away Screaming. I tried this last week and it works amazingly well.

6. Over My Dead Body. This one's a little old school, but it's perfect for repeat offenders. Plus you can always throw in the threat of haunting to spice things up.

7. The Jedi Wave. Some folks simply don't get that they should pay for commercial services; they really feel entitled to free drawings and stuff, no matter how you explain it. And they even get kinda mad when you just say no. It's far better to hypnotize them. Help me Obi-Wan Kenobe, you're my only hope.

8. Mirth. Burst out laughing. Especially effective if someone offers to pay you with tweets.

9. If all else fails, Spell It Out. If you view these two drawings in the Lightbox skin, you can animate them and say the word "no" at the same time. TRY IT - just click on the drawing.

I may publish a collection of some of the more absurd emails asking me for free drawings. I'll even pay myself to illustrate it - oh, the irony!

GREEN Christmas - Top 10 Funniest.

2011-12-24T13:21:00.005-05:00

1. Grinch it. Bully a small dog into helping you steal Christmas only to give it back at the last minute. Sounds fun right? You don't hafta wear pants and your heart will grow three sizes.

2. Envy. Simply covet thy neighbour's gifts!

3. Greenback. Buy a winning lottery ticket, for a change.

4. Zombie. That dude you kissed under the mistletoe is now gnawing on your shoulder.

5. Nausea. Too much rich food will make you green around the gills.

6. Practical Presents. Wine probably fits into this category. It's not exactly environmental, but hey, it's wine. As The Huz says, "wouldn't you rather give your money to a family run vineyard than a big pharmaceutical company?"

7. Orion Slave Girls. They make a nice holiday treat....if you're into alien sex. Uh, I mean sects.

8. Last Minute Green Gift. You get a surprise visit from Aunt Mildred, and she's got gifts for the whole family. But you have no gift for her! Uh-oh....better sneak into the bathroom with your laptop and get her a Kiva Gift Card to loan $25 to third world entrepreneur.

9. Noob it. Enjoy the green sensation of learning something new.

10. Make-up! Get your fabulous friends to paint you green and take pictures.

Got any more?

Kathy Slamen Photography, Body painting Alex Hansen, Hair & make-up Naita Ratycz, jewelry and hair accessory by Serafina, vintage gown courtesy private collection of Nancy Marrelli.

GANGSTA 101.

2011-12-22T21:29:00.003-05:00

Welcome to today's episode of ...

Please welcome my special guest Interviewee, grade 8 school teacher and self proclaimed Smartness...JW Moxie!

JC: JW, hey welcome to the show! Let's start with a skill testing Gangsta question: Do you think that "evolution" should be taught in schools?

JW: I mean, like, yeah. It should totally be like, a subject because Adam and Eve and then dinosaurs - HELLO, DARWIN. Personally I believe that evolution and creationism are both like, important theories and stuff. Like math. I believe that math should be taught in schools, too. Wait - what was the question?

JC: And that answer is correct! One of the things I like about your writing is the Gangsta timing. Timing is a big deal for animators. Do you have any idea what I'm talking about?

JW: Timing? It's always a good time to be a Gangsta. Unless by "timing," you meanthe ability to deliver a punchline or theme statement at the appropriate point of narration to achieve the desired emotional effect.

JC: Uh. You had me at "good time".

JW: I win!

JC: Okay Missus Smartnessypants, keep your panties on. Your fave Gangsta word seems to be "Word". Since you're so knowledged in English, what are your all time favourite made up words?

JW: Good question. wreckadent (n): a wreck that's worse than your standard accident; f*cknuttery (n): something so effed up that it's nutty; ballsome (adj.): having the balls to be awesome;. "That joker cut me off in traffic and almost caused a wreckadent. It was pure f*cknuttery, but because I'm ballsome, I let him off with a stern look instead of flipping him the bird." WORD.

JC: So you're an English teacher as well as a Gangsta, right? Which Great Names from literature (not including The Bloggess) do you think are Gangsta material and why?

JW: Dean Koontz (Just kidding). Gloria Naylor - I love how she subtly weaves her books together with whispered allusions (i.e. The Women of Brewster Place and Bailey's Cafe). Another favorite is Theodore Geisel aka Dr. Seuss.

JC: Dr. Seuss? I've heard of Dr. Seuss!!

JW: Contrary to popular belief he is the OG of rap, not Grandmaster Flash.

JC: Let's pretend you're a Gangsta for reals: you're walking down the street being badass, and when you get to the corner a Buddhist nun stops you and asks you to hold the end of a piece of string for a minute. The nun takes the other end of the string and disappears around the corner with it. You wait. A really. Long. Time. And then finally you decide to cautiously peer around the corner. There, holding the other end of the string and peering back at you is Donald Trump! What do you say to him?

JW: "Trump. Dude, really? Are your hands so busy counting greenbacks that you couldn't hold the string? You had to tie it around your weenie? Playing "pull my finger" wasn't sophomoric enough for you? You're fired. And please, for the love of all that is Gangsta, do something about that combover."

Word.

The "YO! YO" drawing was part of an awesome Christmas mug-swap for the Aiming Low writers. Yes, she's drinking out of it right now, go see.

UPDATE: My mug from JW arrived this afternoon! It is The Ballsome. Are we in sync or whut?

Damn, it feels good to be a gangsta.

Deeds & Magpie!

2011-12-20T22:27:00.001-05:00

Little Deeds doesn't know it yet but he's getting an updated version of the Dog4Deeds drawing with Magpie on a t-shirt.

Don't know who Deeds is? He's a little boy with autism. And Magpie is his autism service dog - she keeps an eye on him. It was nearly a year ago that Caryn Haluska AKA @ihave7monsters recruited me to help Deeds' family. Back then, none of us knew what kind of dog would be found for Deeds, so I drew a Golden Retriever. Turns out Magpie is a pretty Black Lab!

I'm still so proud of what we achieved together. It was one of those special social media moments where so many folks came together to help someone. You know who you are.

Don't tell Deeds about the t-shirt!

Those are MY gloves.

2011-12-19T19:08:00.001-05:00

I lost my favorite gloves whilst shopping at the Alexis Nihon Plaza this weekend. When I got home, I called every shop I went into.

Me: Bonjour, I was in your shop today and I lost my gloves. Have you seen them?

Storeperson: Gloves? What colour?

Me: They're green! They have no fingers, they look like crocodiles, with teeth. I really love them.

Storeperson: One moment please.

Me: Okay! I really hope you find them. I bought them in Paris four years ago. They're irreplaceable....

Storeperson: Madame? I am sorry. We have not seen your glasses.

If you see anyone wearing these gloves, they're mine. Thanks.

The YES-a-holic.

2011-12-17T22:59:00.002-05:00

This story originally appeared on Aiming Low. Something recently happened to me which prompted me to re-purpose it here, with a different ending...

* * * * *

Hi. My name is JC…

… and I’m a YES-a-holic.

It’s not always the word “yes”; other words are involved. Like “sure”.

And “Okay”.

And sometimes it’s just, you know, good old-fashioned submissive posture.

I guess my problem is that I’m unable to say “no”.

I want to please. So I try to do it ALL… which inevitably leads to The Overwhelmption.

When you see an angler fish in the room with you, you know you're in too deep.

But once in a while something comes along, that you simply must say "no" to.

What should I say? I can't go to the shop and buy food with tweets. I can't pay my electric bill with tweets. I can't clothe my kids with tweets.

So I did what any red blooded animator would do.

I fell off my chair.

But I still managed to avoid saying "no". I am a true Yes-a-holic.

It happens more often than you'd think - someone just expects an artist to give up their work in exchange for 'exposure'. In some cases, such as causes, I will draw just for love and fun. But greed and bad behaviour is a big turn off, in real life and social media alike.

What is your take on this?

Here are 9 ways to say NO.

Punk HAIR Possibilities.

2011-12-15T12:24:00.000-05:00

My hair is long and layered. But I'm BORED of looking so ...normal. I wanna go punk! So I put my own face on these hairstyles to better visualize.

What about this? Still long, looks like it's easy to keep, no fancy straightening or blow drying needed. But bangs? I'm not sure...

This one is def short and will grow out quickly. I'd need to get it touched up every month. Expensive, right?

This = classic. But it means I'd have to give up doing headstands.

Which one should I do? Am I going to regret this? How many middle aged women have punk hair?

Haaaaaaalp...

The Grinch's Missing INCH.

2011-12-14T23:31:00.000-05:00

Is it just me, or has anyone else noticed something wrong with this dude?

I double dog dare you guys to leave the lyrics to the Mr. Grinch song in the comments. I'll start you off:

"You're a mean one, Mister Grinch..."

Kicking Cancer's BUTT.

2011-12-10T17:48:00.003-05:00

You guys are amazing. There were a whopping 68 comments on The Supah-Sam Contest!! All to cheer on a little 4 year old boy with leukemia. I'm so proud of you.

So much imagination! There were many fine entries but one truly nailed it:

"Dear anummated laydi, I'm 4 years old, my name is Conners aka @allconsoffun and I want you to draw me beating cancer up with Supah-Sam because cancer is a mean ugly villian!!! Draw me as HALF AS cool as Supah-Sam cuz NOBODY can be as cool as Supah-Sam"

I think this is the drawing we all want to see.

DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR THE BIG C. Cancer deserves to get it's butt kicked by a couple of four year olds.

Congratulations to Connie! She actually has a t-shirt in real life that says "I fight like a girl". After drawing her as Supah-GRRRL today I noticed she'd been tweeting "GRRRRRRRR" quite a few times. Coinkidink? I think not!

Now listen folks, Connie's mom passed away this morning. I've known Con for two and a half years on Twitter - we bonded over Boobie Wednesday, a campaign to promote self examination and breast cancer awareness. She's a tireless advocate for cancer survival and awareness. I asked her if she was comfortable with this post going up today and she said she was. Her mom was a 3 year cancer survivor herself and a lovely woman who will be missed by many. I know that Connie would be appreciative of any comments and condolences left here.

Take home message...The Supah-Sam Contest was all about boosting morale. Please carry this away with you and pay it forward: hug someone you love, offer a shoulder to lean on, an ear to listen and a kind word. When others are in need, it's important to reach out and respond, in whatever way you can.

Special thank-you's to Sam, Sam's parents, and @JWMoxie The Smartness, who touched me with her story about Sam.

Get Your Daily MOJO with the Pickle Weasel CALENDAR.

2011-12-08T11:55:00.002-05:00

Got a friend who's down in the dumps? Someone who needs a little extra lift in their life? Mid-life crisis got yer mojo? The Pickle Weasel Calendar is a farking celebration of mojo! This is an excellent choice for a Christmas gift for anybody.

Pickle Weasel has totally hijacked a bunch of my blog posts and pickleweasel-ed them.*

*Notice how I totally blame him? And this is just a small slice of the drawing.

Pretty great right? You can get the regular calendar, or you can get the ENHANCED one with QR Code fun boosters. Every month has a little QR code on the drawing which when scanned, will take you to the funny blog post. For example:

Don't know how QR codes work? Click here for my tutorial. See? I thought of everything! Irresistible, right? You're welcome.

Note: Buy it HERE. I'll make $5.07 on every medium sized calendar. It's not a lot, but it'll help pay for the toilet paper around here. Support your local bloggy cartoonist!

If you love Pickle Weasel, lemme hear ya say "MOJO!"

QR Codes and STUFF.

2011-12-07T20:41:00.003-05:00

I made some new business cards (I use the term "business" loosely).

There's a QR code on the back instead of loads of text. Honestly, I wish everyone used them for their cards cuz it's kind of a pain to manually input names, numbers, websites, twitter handles, G+ profiles blah blah blah. See where I'm going with this? One nicely integrated QR code can do it all. I used this site to generate my QR codes.

"How do I read a QR code, JC?"

Aha! I thought you might ask that. This vlog is short and you get a nice view of my lap.

For those who prefer list instructions:

You need a smartphone. Stupidphones don't do QR codes.
Download a QR reader app onto your smartphone.
Point your smartphone at the QR code, as if you were gonna take a picture of it. Make sure you see it in your viewer.
The phone reads the code and displays the info on the screen.
The app menu will offer you the chance to save the info in a number of ways.
If it doesn't work, you maybe need to get your phone's IQ checked.

I heard there was some mistrust of QR codes cuz they're being used for commercial marketing and stuff and folks are sensitive to that. I also heard that you should only read a QR from a trusted source in case of viruses. I plan on using them to enhance print media with cartoons and animation cuz it's fun, fun, fun!

Stay tooned for tomorrow's release of the Pickle Weasel Calendar, complete with QR code FUN enhancers.

A camera that focuses close-up is on my Christmas wish list.

I Draw YOU - @qstreet

2011-11-28T21:56:00.002-05:00

This beauty is the wonderful winner of my Couch Potato - Super Spud contest. Her name is Sam Parrotto, but you may know her as @qstreet on Twitter. According to her bio, Sam seeks magic.

But I think magic just found her.

Inspiration for this drawing came from a magical photo of @qstreet by her friend @Jackinessity.

Want to be drawn by me? Subscribe to this blog and don't miss the next contest.

The Supah-Sam CONTEST!

2011-11-23T00:07:00.006-05:00

Introducing...four year old Sam, who loves peanut butter and jelly passionately, and wants to fly through the sky in a blue Supah Suit. Did I mention his favorite color?

This imaginative little boy is the surro-baby of my friend The Smartness AKA @JWMoxie. She cried out for help last week cuz Sam has leukemia. That's cancer folks.

Why the contest? Morale!

Sam just started chemo and he's bravely facing the ordeal with his parents, Terry and Stephanie, and a very fine companion named Chemo Duck. I wanna cheer them on.

Now, when you're four... your imagination is in free flow, unfettered by responsibilities. So for this contest, I want you to pretend that you are four years old, like Sam! Use your imagination.

All you have to do to enter is comment below, like this:

"Dear anummated laydi, I'm 4 years old, my name is _________ and I want you to draw me dooing _________. Draw me as cool as Supah-Sam."
Get out there in the real world and hug somebody you love. This part is super important. If you don't do it your name will be mud.
Then Stumble, Tweet, G+ or Facebook this contest. Use this hash tag liberally - #SaveOurSam.

Zee Prize: I'll draw the winner as a four year old and give them a t-shirt AND a mug with it.

Zee Rules: You can only enter once. Most inspiring entry wins. I get to decide that and if you want to know how my brain works, well, just check out a few of my previous contests. If there's over a hundred entries I'll award a few consolation prizes. Contest closes Friday December 2nd at midnight. Winners announced the following Monday.

By entering this contest, you agree to allow me to draw you and to blog the drawing of you. I own the artwork but you can use it as your avatar if you want!

I like to get behind causes from time to time. A little animation can go a long way.

Find out who won!

The Emperor's KLOUThes.

2011-11-21T11:19:00.000-05:00

WARNING: Full frontal nudity.

According to their blog, the new Klout scoring model is now more transparent that ever.

I dunno guys....it doesn't look any different to me.

More Klout funny?

Share.

The MIGHTY Mouse III

2011-11-19T19:11:00.001-05:00

...continued.

Last episode he was sick at home and wondering if he'd rocked his report card hard enough to deserve a pet mouse. The 11 year old boy languished.

Oh the frustration.

Oh the suffering.

Oh the runny nose...!

Until the 14 year old sister went to see his teacher and brought the report card home.

I laid the sealed envelope on the table and took my eleven year old son by the shoulder. I looked deep into his eyes and said, "If your report card shows a big thumbs up in math, what are you gonna get?"

"Um...a mouse?"

"And if your report card shows a big thumbs down in math, what are you gonna get?"

He looked down at the floor and his eyes welled up with tears.

I held his chin in my hand and tilted his face up to mine.

"Boy, you've got a great attitude, happy pets and a tidy room. I've seen all your homework done and the tests you've proudly brought home to show us. You tried.

I don't need to open that report card; in my book you've more than earned that mouse."

Meet the mighty ~~mouse~~ mice!

Let's give the boy a big hi-five!

Share.

Weeping.

2011-11-16T19:14:00.001-05:00

Yesterday I noticed that Bambi was slowing down. I offered her some romaine leaves and she did munch on them a bit. But she suddenly seemed smaller than her friend Momo. She'll be leaving us soon, I thought.

Although we all help look after them, Bambi and Momo are the 14 year old daughter's. She got them from the SPCA a few months after her first pig Mr. Snow finished his long life. The SPCA would only let them go as a pair; guinea pigs are social creatures and many are happiest with a life-long companion.

I'm sorry to say that Bambi was not doing well this morning. She lay in her hut, her eyes half-lidded. Momo lay beside her and when I passed near she'd venture out saying "Weep, weep, weep!"

And around mid-day Bambi slipped away...

* * * *

Bambi is now lovingly wrapped in pale purple tissue paper. Tomorrow in the morning light, she'll be laid to rest under the paving stones in the garden. She'll have Mr. Snow to keep her company, along with Night Silver, Ginger and Misu. Come spring, there will be crocuses.

As for Momo, she's "weeping" for real... We're hoping she can soon settle in with Goosie , the 17 year old daughter's pig.

Guinea pigs make wonderful pets; they're soft and furry, and they happily sit on your lap and allow you to stroke them. Our kids have helped to care for them, whispered secrets to them, written stories about them and sought comfort in their gentle warmth.

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The MIGHTY Mouse II

2011-11-15T20:48:00.003-05:00

...continued.

Last episode, the 11 year old boy RAGED because math stood between him and a mouse.

With one week until back-to-school I decided to lay down The Law.*
*Cuz I'm not always a YES-a-holic.

1. Attitude: be gracious and respectful, even if you disagree.
2. Current pets need attention, love and care.
3. You must ROCK the first report card.

Then you can get your mouse.

At first he scowled. But realized immediately he'd instantly put even more distance between himself and El Mouso.

The weeks passed. Never has a boy in the history of boys been so focused on a goal.

1. He not only did his chores, he consistently offered to help with additional stuff, like mowing the lawn, vacuuming the car interior, cooking dinner and the occasional pedicure. He even cleaned his room without being asked. I know, right? My jaw is still hanging.

2. The goldfish (a gigantic 10 inch long beast) could now actually see me staring back at it through the glass of a clean aquarium.

The guinea pigs had an additional person changing their water and plying them with fresh veges previously destined for the compost.

The dog was played with...

...and taught a few new tricks...

...oh dear...um.

*Ahem.*

3. The boy insisted on sitting at the front of the math class instead of at the back. Tests were looked forward to and prepared for, the results were proudly displayed to us instead of being hidden in a crumple at the bottom of the schoolbag, homework was ploughed through with great determination. When he didn't understand something, he actually asked for help.

We're not talking two weeks of improvement here, we're talking two months. With no lapse. Which is a lot when you are eleven.

In between all this, the boy ached for his mouse. He studied mouse training videos.

He built a fantastic multi-level mouse habitat with his father.

He hoped the mouse he wanted at the pet store would not be fed to another animal...no 11 year old boy has looked forward to his first Grade 6 report card in quite the same way.

However, the teachers delayed the release of the report cards by three more weeks. The boy was disappointed, but he kept with the program.

The mouse he had his eye on at the pet store mysteriously disappeared...

But he kept on.

Then the boy got the flu and had to be kept home for two weeks. He worried that his grades would be affected. He worried that he would fall behind in the homework. He worried that the report card would be issued while he was sick at home....

...which it was.

OMGaaaaaaa. How will the boy get his report card...? And will he rock it? Most of all, will this 11 year old boy ever get his mouse?!?

Find out what happens next!!

Share.

The GIFT.

2011-11-14T20:57:00.001-05:00

When I started drawing my blog, I never thought that I would touch people's lives. I never dreamed that someone would do this for me.

Stephi Linn you got skillz.

Twitter's own @Gypsy_Momma - or "Giraffe Legs", as I like to call her - is a glass painting artist at BooMonkey Creations. She lovingly painted a collection of her fave drawings from my blog onto a re-purposed window with a toothpick. It took her several months to paint and many fingers crossed that it wouldn't break in transit. Here's the Epic Reveal in Stephi's own words.

Thank-you Stephi and Brian, all those who helped get this beautiful gift to me in one piece (including the US Postal service), and to everyone in the I Draw YOU collection. You inspire me and I shall treasure it always.

Who do you recognize?

Share.

The MIGHTY Mouse.

2011-11-13T20:56:00.005-05:00

The dreaded phone call came late last June.

"Hello Mrs. Little. This is Vice Principle Mr. LongGreekname from your son's school. He needs math tutoring over the summer to survive Grade 6 in the fall." Click! Dial tone.

The Huz had already left for England with the 11 year old boy and his eldest sister, so when I Skyped them to relay the message there were cries of dismay.

Yep. Summer was gonna be eaten by the times-table.

* * * *

Fast forward to late August.

Vacation is nearly over and the boy suddenly announces he can't wait to get a "mouse".

"Uh...excuse me?"

In fact he can talk of little else. It's all "mouse this" and "mouse that".

"What about the pets you already have? The monster goldfish in the Swamparium...

...the three smelly guinea pigs...

...and the depraved canine...?"

But he can't hear me.

"I'm gonna train my mouse and I'm gonna build a mouse cage with tubes and I'm gonna get a fancy mouse and I'm gonna mouse mouse mouse mousey mouse mouse infinity mouse!"

I decide to quiz the boy on multiplication and division with big numbers. Whereupon he flings himself around the room, kicking and screeching like an angry chimpanzee.

Turns out that despite summer tutoring he has retained little of the times-table or methods in multiplication and division. His room is flirting with hoarder. His attitude totally sucks!
And he thinks he's gonna get a mouse?

This particular boy is not unintelligent. But perhaps he is lazy and somewhat presumptuous. What do you think I should do?

To be continued ...

Share.

Eleven ELEVEN Eleven

2011-11-11T00:43:00.002-05:00

Today comes once in a hundred years.

On a scale of one to ten, THIS DAY goes all the way up to eleven.

So crank it people. Let your inner PICKLE Weasel run free. And have yourselves a ONEderful ~~day~~... ~~month~~... ~~year~~ LIFE.

Share this.

From Couch Potato... to SUPER SPUD!

2011-11-04T00:05:00.012-04:00

How did the couch potato...

...turn into a super spud?

Motivation.

Stewart Rogers @TheRealSJR wants to raise cash and awareness for the Make-A-Wish Foundation by getting off his ~~lazy french-fried butt~~ couch to run the 10K Obstacle Course Challenge. This is gonna grant wishes to children and young people fighting life-threatening illnesses.

I wanna help too....but I'm a draw-er not a runner. So I'm gonna draw one of YOU. Yeah!

It's a contest:

Go donate to Stewart's fundraiser. Give what you can. Even $1 gets you entered.
Leave your name and Twitter handle (or some other way to find you) in the comments below.
Hit the Tweet button below, and wish @TheRealSJR luck.

How will I know you've done all three? I have my eye on you (<-- see what I did there?). Contest closes Thursday November 11th, 2011 at 11:11 PM EST.

The Prize: On Sunday November 13th, one day after Stewart has ~~survived~~ kicked this obstacle course in the goolies, I'll draw the winner...and draw the winner. You'll get a t-shirt or mug with your "mug" on it.

DONATE NOW.
Every little bit helps.

Find out who won!

Here's where you hit the Tweet button.

GREEN Hallowe'en.

2011-10-30T14:27:00.001-04:00

I always wanted to be green.

Ever since seeing that green alien in Star Trek.

Oops, no, I meant this green alien in Star Trek...

My friend Kathy (AKA @HelloPhotoKitty) is so talented.

I just love the light she gets...

...and I feel really comfortable with her.

Some subjects are a photographer's muse....but I think Kathy is my muse.

What are you dressing up as?

A safe Hallowe'en to you I wish.
Forget not your teeth to brush.
In Yoda-speak to comment you must.

Kathy Slamen Photography, Body painting Alex Hansen, Hair & make-up Naita Ratycz.

Trick or Treat.

Compare your KLOUT Score with your SEXYTIME!

2011-10-27T22:50:00.001-04:00

No algorithm needed to predict this particular KLOUT Perk. And prolly the only Klout perk that comes with -K. (<-- see what I did there?)

And no, it doesn't matter which colour is which.

If you were sad to see your Klout Score drop, I hope I've cheered you up.

Share.

My KLOUToris.

2011-10-27T11:22:00.000-04:00

WARNING: You have been warned.

My Klout score has been going down (<--see what I did there?) since yesterday's Klout Fall. Turns out I'm not all that influential... but the good news is that there is one person in my life I am able to influence and he's giggling over my shoulder as I write this.

Share.

The KLOUT Fall.

2011-10-27T00:28:00.002-04:00

The big news today is that Klout changed its algorithm* to be more accurate. Yay for accuracy! I, along with many others, found our Klout scores hurtling towards certain ignominy, without a parachute. Turns out we weren't as influential as we thought we were.

Does this matter? I don't know! I have yet to figure Klout out. Here are 5 things a high Klout score probably cannot do for you:

Rub ointment on your chilblains.
Comfort you when you cry at movies.
Get you a roll of toilet paper when you really, really need it.
Draw a funny picture of you.
Tell you when Mr. Crusty is hanging out of your nose.
Feed you bacon. Wait, that's six. Okay six things then.

But perhaps Klout can actually feed you. So I want to know - have you or anyone you know ever put food on the table, i.e. landed a job or a sponsor, based on what their Klout score is? If so, I'll give you some +K and a big high five.

Drawing stuff about Klout is fun. I like it because Klout taps into a basic human condition: the need to be validated. If you're upset about your plummeting score, it might be useful to remember that Klout is not a social service, it's a business. You are valuable and awesome with -K and a big high five!

*An algorithm is a really amazing and fabulous thing that can predict stuff, like what size underwear your future mother-in-law will wear. Probably.

Arrr...!

2011-10-26T02:31:00.002-04:00

I've drawn a gal with giraffe legs, and I've drawn a giraffe in a box. But this here pirate giraffe is for my Twitter pal Ed R. Or Ed Arrrrr...! as I like to call him.

Get below ye scurvy weasel an' fetch me my rum. Arrr.

Watching The NOTEBOOK.

2011-10-24T02:02:00.002-04:00

The Huz said he was 90% made of water...until we watched The Notebook the other night.

It's a beauty of a film, directed by Nick Cassavetes, a love story with stellar performances by James Garner and Gena Rowlands. A story of true love, triumphant against all odds.

I had seen it once before, a few years ago, so I knew what was coming...

Yeah, so 90% water and what's the remaining 10%...? Please tell me what movies made you cry.

Share.

I Draw YOU - @AmazingSusan

2011-10-20T17:32:00.006-04:00

The Amazing Susan is truly amazing, and she has the eyewear to prove it.

Can't see the Flashy interactive game above? Hmmmm....prolly cuz you're on a MAC or iPad or something. I'm sorry. You'll have to be satisfied with only one drawing. The non-clicky buttons may taunt you, but just try to ignore them.

Susan Macaulay is many amazing things, not least of which is the fact that she is creator and curator of AmazingWomenRock.com. If you're looking for motivation, celebration or inspiration - you will find it there. Susan's glasses always half full! (<--See what I did there? "Susan's glasses"? Okay, I'll stop now.)

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"FRENCHING" ...an independent film.

2011-10-18T17:20:00.003-04:00

I made a film!

Have you ever felt like an outsider? A stranger in a strange land...? Joe Ollmann, (a Doug Wright Award-winning cartoonist), plays himself live and animated as an English-speaking transplant fumbling his way through French-speaking Montreal.

Me and my videographer friend Jen wanted to do a film together. I was obsessed with making Joe's characters come to life. Here's how we made "Frenching".

Joe is as nice as he is funny and talented, and I'd work with him again in a heartbeat. The animators had fun with his characters too. I also loved the music by Tom Mennier.

Recognize any famous Montreal landmarks?

PS: I embedded the directors' cut here cuz it has the credits and I think the team deserve credit. Here's the Bravo!FACT version; we thank them kindly for assisting in the funding.

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Pulling G-rank.

2011-10-17T00:31:00.003-04:00

I was busted by the Google Police for breaking the G-law. Oh, how I languished behind bars!

My 96 year old Grandma came to my rescue: she totally pulled G-rank.

You see, Google had put my G+ account under review for using the name "JC Little".

Maybe they were suspicious of the name "JC"...? Maybe they thought it was a nym?

You can't argue with my Grandma. She's a retired Judge. And she was also the Chairman of Hallowe'en for the whole province of Quebec when UNICEF started their Trick or Treat collection thing back in the day. Someone had to organize the schools for that and my Grandma was that someone.

I know you're impressed right? So how 'bout a +1 for Pickle Weasel?

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The KING of the CORN.

2011-10-08T23:06:00.001-04:00

We got up early today and went to the Jean Talon Market. Man, I love it there. We picked up a few dozen corn on the cob - fresh farm picked from Le Roi du Maïs* - with no pesticides. How awesome is that?
*The King of Corn.

So this evening I'm shucking this fabulously fresh pesticide free sweet corn thinking about butter and I get to about the 9th cob. I peel back the leaves and notice a tiny dark spot on the tip. So I take a closer look and the darn thing begins to extrude itself from the corn right before my very eyes. A worm! And it's waving at me!

"AAAAAAAAA!" I screamed and dropped the corn into the sink. Everyone came running.

Now you may not know this about me but I'm squeamish when it comes to larvae of any kind, including caterpillars. Something about their undulating, blobby shapes just makes me wanna hurl. BLEGH!

The 17 year old daughter felt sorry for the worm so she scooped him up and found him a cozy spot in the garden compost. As for me, I totally lost my appetite for a whole ten minutes. I was truly grossed out. But even so, I was thinking, wow, this pesticide free corn means I might encounter a pest or two. Hmmmm....

Folks, squeamish as I am, I'll take the pests over the pesticides any day.

Vive Le Roi du Maïs!

Share this corny story.

Get INSPIRED!

2011-10-05T21:31:00.000-04:00

ANNOUNCEMENT: Yeah, this is what I've been squirming about for the past month.

Remember my quest to get Wacom's attention? Well, it worked! I've been featured on their new "Get Inspired" site. They sent a team to film me right here in my home studio. Check out their video of me while I was drawing my new film "Inspiration". You even get to see some of the junk on my desk!

It's hard to talk about yourself when you're ~~terrified~~ shy. I was ~~filling up my shorts~~ brave.

If you don't know what a Wacom is - it's a pen tablet. I use one to draw straight into the computer. You'll often see it in my drawings of myself drawing.

There's some cool artists up there with me; it's worth checking out just for that. Plus there's a "One Thousand Forests" contest you can enter (whether you use a Wacom or not). For every person who participates, they'll donate $5 to the International Child Art Foundation. It's all very, very cool and right on.

Go get inspired!

A note of thanks to the person behind the @Wacom on Twitter. Also @TheGoToMom, @MarcyMassura and especially the lovely @DotandLil; she kicked my butt and started all this.

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Inspiration.

2011-10-04T21:55:00.001-04:00

This is what it's like to be me.

Where do ideas come from? Are some people more likely to get them than others? Do you agree there's a difference between inspiration and creativity? I wonder what motivates someone to turn an idea into reality...questions that need answers!

I'm struck by new ideas all the time. I want to do them ALL. And I'm determined to try!

What inspires you?

Share.This film was featured on Wacom's Get Inspired site.

MORE Funny One Liners.

2011-10-02T03:10:00.000-04:00

Okay, here's another FREE drawing lesson for you. It's easy, all you have to do is follow these simple steps. Ready?

We're going to start with a few simple lines. Just grab whatever it is you use to draw, and go for it - wiggly, straight or bent. Lines have a hidden personality, so let's discover it.

Next you just add some dots...put them anywhere you wish!

A few extra little dashes here and there to refine the pose...

Words magically put everything into context.

And a splash of color to give it that extra zing!

WARNING: Try to work quickly; you don't want to miss your dead line.

Lemmeno how it goes!

PS - When I googled Tarzan's cry, the 17 year old daughter said it sounded like "auto-tune on crack". Which it kinda does.

Share.

About GROUT.

2011-09-30T01:31:00.000-04:00

My recent vestibule floor tiling escapades have taken yet another turn for the worse.But it's okay cuz PICKLE Weasel came to cheer me up.

Lady at the specialty tile shop: "Non, Madame Little. Do not seal ze tiles beforrre ze grouting. You must seal zem afterrr applying ze grout."

Moi: "Are you sure? The grout is black; I'm worried the grout will stain them!"

Lady: "Don't worrry Madame Little. Ze tiles will not stain. Follow ze Installation Guide" (points to a piece of paper). "Zeese tiles are verrrry spécial. You must follow ze guide. Now if you don't mind, I will feeneesh my lunch brrreak."

Moi: "Okay."

I followed the Installation Guide to ze letterrr, dammit. I got half way through the grouting and stopped. My tiles are so stained.

PICKLE Weasel to the rescue!

The AUTOGRAPH.

2011-09-24T22:19:00.000-04:00

Last weekend the 11 year old boy went to the Montreal Comicon with his dad, The Huz. (I wanted to go too, but was attending the Gala thingie, alas.) The boy had it in his mind that he was going to get to meet Stan Lee, cuz, uh....Spiderman, duh. He'd saved his pennies from mowing the lawn and cleaning the car and forked out $50 just for this, on top of the ticket price.

The boy waited in line for three hours, and then...

All he could muster was a shy, "H-h-hi...?"

And then, drumroll please.....

TADAA!!

300 autographs in 45 minutes, and still smiling. Let no one wonder what this gentleman's superpowers are!

The GALA.

2011-09-22T19:50:00.000-04:00

On Sunday I got to go to Les Gemeaux Awards*. I had no idea what to wear, so I called up my producer; she told me it was the event of the year! Great. No pressure there.
*Think "Emmys" but for French speaking Canada.

I dressed up as groovy as I could...and gazed up close at local celebs posing red carpet style for camera flashes. I saw some amazing shoes.

My show was nominated in two categories. As they were about to announce the winners, my producer whispered that I would have to join her onstage if we won. Pretty sure all the colour drained from my face at that point. I experienced a bizarre dichotomy of simultaneously hoping to both win and lose.

We didn't win...but it was such an honour just to be nominated. And being invited to the Gala was amazing. I had fun!
Congratulations to all the winners.

The PUNCHING Bag.

2011-09-20T16:36:00.000-04:00

This past week, The Internet used me as a punching bag.

Not you. Another part of The Internet.

I'm not going to point fingers or play the blame game. I won't draw you into the battle, so to speak. But I will share this:

I've learned a lot more about human nature, with its propensity to swarm and attack without questioning.
I've learned that there is good in people if you give them a chance.
And mostly, I've learned that I'm stronger and smarter than I thought I was. So I'm actually grateful.

Thank-you The Internet!

Rabbit in the STARLIGHT!

2011-09-13T18:09:00.001-04:00

I was scared.....but I DID IT ANYWAYS.

And I didn't get run over! I can't tell you what it was though...yet.

I'm lucky to have people around who have faith in me - you're like starlight. Thankees.

Rabbit in the HEADLIGHTS.

2011-09-12T23:58:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow I'm doing something special. And scary.

I'm terrifed.

Please say, "Good luck JC!"

Find out how it went...

Crapola.

2011-09-10T03:52:00.003-04:00

Warning: Dog business.

I came home earlier this evening to find poor Miss Doggie locked in our bedroom. No idea how this happened. I managed to find the one key in a drawer full of keys and let her out. She tore past me, raced down the stairs and didn't even say thanks. Sheesh.

The good news? The dog hadn't actually peed in the room. The bad news...?

CRAPOLA!

I know, it's a drawing of a turd. It's late, I'm tired, and turds are funny. As long as you can't smell them. And look, I think it likes you.

The brown crayons were @BigDaddySaid's idea!

BUSTED! The Google POLICE.

2011-09-08T13:07:00.001-04:00

This morning I signed into my Google+ and was greeted with this.

My soul iced over. The law had finally caught up with me.

I'm guessing the Google Police want me to change my name from "JC Little - The Animated Woman" to simply, "JC Little".

For the record (← haha, see what I did there? record?), I'm not a proponent of total anonymity on the web. But only cuz it seems to be engendering a lack of accountability and irresponsible behavior. Nicknames and pseudonyms are ok, and I appreciate that sometimes we need to protect ourselves. But some folks (Trolls and Haters) tend to hide behind them like some people hide behind hoodies.

So what's next for my G+ account? I'm on review. I had to submit links to my LinkedIN and Facebook to prove I am "JC Little". Can you smell the stinkie poo-poo IRONY?

And if they kick me off....I can promise you one hell of an awesome ass-kicking mofo post. They'll never let me out of Google Jail after that.

I love ya!

The Cyborg MOM.

2011-09-08T00:11:00.000-04:00

My kids believe I ~~spend~~ waste an awful lot of time on the Internet doing social media. Even I begin to wonder, "Am I real...or am I a Spam-Bottomed Cyborg MOM with Happy Face Nipples holding my brain hostage?"

Yeah, so this one came out of a Facebook convo between a bunch of lovely people, but mostly @CollinsBat and @Coolwhipmom on account of the 10 Best Humor Sites that Naomi (who is a very funny lady btw and if you don't believe me then just read this) wrote up over at SheKnows. You know how it goes; he said this, she said that, and here I am drawing it.

And now you're prolly wondering WTF?!? you should leave as a comment.

Laughing Out Loud... OUT LOUD.

2011-09-07T00:34:00.000-04:00

I was doing the dishes, by hand, and the 14 year old was helping me by drying. I like this cuz the kids talk about their day when we do dishes. She was laughing about something that happened at school and she said something like: "Bla bla bla - hahahaha! Hilarious LOL!"

She literally said lol, like "laaaaaawwwwwl".

She tried to deny it but I'm an animator and I swear her mouth did this:

And there you have it folks. A new form of LOL-tastic laughter for acronyms is born. More fun than Laughing Out Loud - it's LOL-ing Out Loud!

Or "LOLOL" for short. She totally said I could post this btw.

A Candle.

2011-09-05T19:53:00.001-04:00

I drew this candle for someone I did not know.
It was someone who touched the lives of others, whose family loved them, whose friends will miss them...will ache for them. Someone who took their own life.

The suffering that leads to suicide does not have to be.

Please reach out, seek help.

Friday FTW :D

2011-09-02T15:38:00.003-04:00

Me: Hi Friday Lovers.

Alienmeatsack: Hey back! Friday FTW :D

Me: Right on. I feel like drawing that.

Alienmeatsack: Draw it! I'm a muse, use me :D

Me: Ok. I'll draw myself as a ___________(pick an animal).

Alienmeatsack: Wee, I get to pick something. Ok, how about… a racoon? :D

Me: Racoon it is. Please stand by.

Alienmeatsack: I'm still standing (by). :D Can I sit now please? :D

So....what kind of animal are you?

A nod of thanks to @alienmeatsack from AlienMeatSack.com

Cats, Kittens, Google Plus and Muffins.

2011-09-01T14:57:00.002-04:00

For cat lovers...and muffin lovers!

I see an amazing amount of images of cute cats and kittens in my Google+. They inspired this drawing. I used it on a t-shirt designed for one of the teen actors on the live-action quiz show I'm directing for Carpediem Film & TV. I'll prolly blog that shoot soon.

Why muffins JC? They're nutritious, delicious and you can tell a lot about a person by the way they eat one.

>^+^<

Meow.

Smiling.

2011-08-29T15:46:00.005-04:00

One simple smile can make someone's day.

And that's prolly why you're here.

You've got the power! Go forth and share your smiling!

Hurricane IRENE.

2011-08-28T03:05:00.004-04:00

Hurricane Irene scares the living crap out of me and I'm not even in her path. Turns out she's pissed cuz we've been spelling her name wrong.

Have you encountered the wrath of Irene? Bow down low people, and please stay safe.

Thanks to @TechyDad for inspiration and The Huz for the crown idea. You are awesome.

The Tinkle FAIRY!

2011-08-25T17:41:00.004-04:00

Meet Kim, inspired blogger at MentallyInked.com and also known on Twitter as @MentallyInked. I've been following Kim since I first got on Twitter, like two years ago. She always makes me laugh, and she's the kind of friend who won't hesitate to give you a virtual Heimlich if you should choke on something on the internet. It can happen, right? Also if you need to be reminded to drink water, Kim will help you out.

There's a lotta reasons to drink water. I don't know them off by heart but I do know that it keeps me hydrated, keeps the headaches at bay, and keeps the plumbing moving along as it should. We're pretty lucky to have access to clear, clear drinking water, on tap. Not everyone does.

But if you drink a lot of water, there will be consequences...you will have to go pee. And so Kim has an alter ego: The Tinkle FAIRY.

Dear Kim,
In recognition of the work that you do, I want to thank you by drawing you TWICE. Because:

I love you, even if you've never tried Orangina.
You are helping people in need.
You have a cool knickname.
Whenever someone tinkles, they will think of you. And that makes you kind of like a celebrity.

So there you have it folks! If you know about why people should drink H2O, or any tips on not getting caught too far from a toilet, please share here!

Drawing A BLANK.

2011-08-22T23:17:00.000-04:00

My fingers were itching. I wanted to draw something, but I couldn't think what...

Turns out I was already drawing a blank.

High-5 to @ThatIsSuch for this particular suggestion.

BED Sweet BED.

2011-08-19T23:50:00.001-04:00

This is the awesome conclusion to the Bed's Too Big series.

Going away is cool and all, but it's definitely great to be home. Just don't mention the word "tiles" yet...

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Train SPRINT.

2011-08-16T19:31:00.001-04:00

The holiday is almost over and now we must leave Cornwall for London to catch our flight back to Montreal. I'm writing this to you as I sit on the train. A train I almost missed.

Yes, this morning the Huz and I got up early, rallied our three children to finish packing, eat a hearty breakfast, hug their Granny goodbye, and head down to the train station. No one argued and all was well in the world...

...until we got to the train station and I realized I didn't have my purse. A chill ran down my spine and grey shadows stomped around and rubbed their bogeys on my soul.

Folks, I ran. I ran like the wind, I ran like never before, I ran up hill, up the arcade stairs, up alleyways and up cobbled streets. Up, up, up I ran without stopping, past old ladies and prams with babies, my little heart pounding, blood vesseles bursting and lungs straining. I MUST NOT MISS MY TRAIN!!!

I thought of my poor family standing on the platform waiting for me as the train also waited... and then pulled away. What if they left without me? I ran harder.

Got to the house, gave SharkDOG one last hug, grabbed my purse and ran all the way back down to the station.

My family were all waiting for me! The train was still in the station! In fact, we had plenty of time to walk leisurely down the platform and climb aboard.

The lesson here? Nobody's perfect. Also? I'm not in as bad shape as I thought. They said I made it there and back in about 12 minutes.

The Bucket of BLOOD!

2011-08-14T19:48:00.000-04:00

Possibly the best pub name EVAR is The Bucket of BLOOD in Hayle, Cornwall, UK.

Intrigued as to how it got it's name? I sure was. The story goes that hundreds and hundreds of years ago the site had an Inn on it, catering to miners, sailors, fishermen, smugglers, pirates and the ilk. Yeah, a whole lotta baddass dudes...

Anyways, there was a well which supplied the Inn with water for household use and also to brew the local ale. One morning the unsuspecting Inn Keeper went to the well, pulled up the bucket and was horrified to find it filled with BLOOD!! My Mother In Law said she heard the bucket even had a chopped off head in it. Bleah. They pulled a corpse out of the well, but no one knows who he was. I'll bet the poor Inn Keeper had a bad case of the jitters after that.

So the pub got its name, and it's supposedly haunted to this day; footsteps on creaking floorboards, ghostly figures appearing around the Inn, and so forth. Pretty decent pub food (I had the half chicken and chips) and they make their own bitter! Check out this sign inside the pub:

Gee, I wonder what chuff nuts and dangle berries are...
Know any other interesting pub names?

The HOODY.

2011-08-13T17:18:00.005-04:00

This is a thoughtful response to Youtube videos of the recent London riots and looting.

When I was four, my mom bought me a Kangaroo Shirt.

It was called that because it had a pouch to keep your hands warm. If you put the hood up, you were nice and cozy.

It was pale grey and soft, and I loved it.

In the last decade or so, the hoody has become legit baddass street fashion.
It's mainstream.

And if you put the hood up, a measure of anonymity is within reach. You can hide your face and hair colour.

CCTV surveillance cams are easily snubbed...and accountability evaporates.

Nowadays, a person wearing a hoody may cause a ripple of unease and fear, or prejudice against an innocent fashion conscious youth.

The 14 year old daughter took my 11 year old son out shopping for his back-to-school clothes today. They came back with a Kangaroo Shirt. It looks great on him, but I've made him promise to keep the hood down unless his head is cold.

I have worn hoodies for years. What do you think of them?

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EPIC Marty.

2011-08-11T19:03:00.004-04:00

And now, ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, here's the Grand Prize Winner of The Most EPIC Contest Evar - Marty, AKA @pilot2b.

His entry was challenging: "HOW to draw me... on a motorcycle with wings, with scuba gear on, jumping over an 18-wheeler, about to land in water next to a nuclear power plant. Easy enough."

Are we almost ready for another contest...?

BOOGIE Boarding is FUN.

2011-08-08T21:30:00.000-04:00

I'm in Cornwall UK for a family vacation. There's a healthy surf culture here - I can sorta surf a lil' bit (not really). However I do love boogie boarding; it's easy and fun. So here's a vlog music thingie about it.

But first, a disclaimer: I AM NOT A PHOTOSHOPPED SUPER MODEL. Do not expect pore-less perfection and fountains of youth from me. And try not to look at my bum. Oh, alright, if you really must, go on then.

It was yet another freezing farking day at Godrevy Beach. Like 14°C / 57ºF. Once you're in the water you're fine, provided you're wearing your wetsuit and frolicking non-stop in the surf like a baby seal. The waves weren't particularly huge today but it was still cool. Cold. I love having blue lips.

That's me singing. And I bought the earrings from @tweetgraciemack.

The JETLAG Monster.

2011-08-06T19:15:00.002-04:00

When I travel against the clock, I suffer so bad. The JETLAG Monster nibbles on my soul and I walk around in a stupor. I can't focus, and there's some kinda sand in my eyeballs. This is worse than The Sleepies because actual sleep won't help.

Three days pass. Then suddenly the stupor lifts and I think, "Yay! I'm over it...!"

Wrong.

Some say you should fight the urge to crash out, stay awake as long as you can and then sleep at night. But when I tried that, not only did I babble incoherently throughout the entire day, I was still wide awake at 1 AM.

What are your fool proof cures for jetlag?

Help.

FISH and CHIPS.

2011-08-05T06:33:00.001-04:00

Flew to London, then jumped on the train down to Penzance - a total of 24 hours of travelling. Although happy to be back in the arms of the Huz, I'm majorly jetlagged and it ain't pretty. In fact I'm going to draw the Jetlag Monster just to get even. But first things first. A gal's got to have priorities after all. So here's a rare vlog from me about England's national dish: Fish and Chips.

Anyone who mentions "tiles" or "DIY" before this holiday is up gets a ~~knuckle sandwich~~ rather hard stare.

ESCAPE from the BIG Bed.

2011-08-02T12:03:00.001-04:00

Finally.

After 6 weeks of languishing in the big bed all by myself, me and the 14 year old daughter are headed to England to join the Huz and our two other kids.

I can't wait!!!

When I see them, I'm gonna pretend I'm in one of those movies, running in slow motion, arms outstretched and ready for the hug/spin thingie....

Re-united after a long separation; I know 6 weeks is nothing compared to what some people go through. What are your best re-united stories?

Please share this moment.

ART Therapy.

2011-07-31T03:05:00.004-04:00

When you open your mouth to sing, or string words together on a page, or draw your heart on your sleeve... you open yourself up to the world. And people will smile and be moved when your work touches their lives. But because you've exposed your heart, you become vulnerable. Sometimes you will be attacked.

And when I'm attacked, I say: PICKLE Weasel to the rescue!

Thanks to everyone for the the hugs yesterday; I love you for it. Yeah, drawing this made me feel better too. It's art therapy. Cyber bullies will be kissed off. And now, back to regularly scheduled programming!

How do you respond when you see someone being cyber bullied?

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A Wrecked TILE Dysfunction.

2011-07-28T05:50:00.004-04:00

I must say, I rocked at laying vinyl tiles on the mudroom floor. Until the part where I sat down in the glue... yeah, things kinda went downhill from there. And just before starting on the front entrance floor, I discovered that one must not glue expensive ceramic tiles onto a particle board subfloor as it is too unstable. If it gets wet, which it will (snow, hello), the board will swell causing the tiles to lift and crack. Those who frequent this blog even got to see my stabby face.

And here's what I hope will be the conclusion of my foray into DIY floor tiling.

I gave up on the tiling. And like any self-respecting wife who's husband is off in England for SIX WEEKS, I'd decided to take a night off and drink heavily before putting away all the DIY gear. I left the big bag of floor tile cement powder, along with the two big bags of black grout (also powder) on the little rug in the middle of the freshly tiled (with vinyl tiles) mudroom floor.

It was extremely hot so all the doors were open into the garden, in an effort to tempt the breeze into the house. Suddenly, it began to rain. The rain was crashing down!

It was pouring off the edge of the roof, overwhelming the guttering and literally streaming into every open door! I ran to the garden room (the floor of which was also tiled by moi 6 years ago) and discovered it flooded in an inch of water. I shut the door and mopped it up as quickly as I could; I can't even remember what that sub floor was. And just like that, it stopped raining. Yeesh!

I headed to the mudroom and discovered that it was also wet...

...but there was no puddle of water.

Because it had soaked into the little rug in the middle of the room.

And the paper bags of cement and black grout.

I wish I could tell you it ended there.

But it didn't.

My fourteen year old daughter helped me get the soaking wet bag of cement into a black garbage bag and together we managed to carry it into the garage. But the bag of BLACK grout powder split on the teenager and covered her in fine black dust. It didn't help that she was wearing a nice white shirt that she'd recently bought with her own money. So then I got to see her stabby face.

Fun times, right?

Well any ways the next day I went into the mudroom and I see that the tiles I so lovingly glued down on a particle board subfloor had lifted and cracked in what I can only describe as a flash flood.

And the wet cement? Solid.

I literally could not make this stuff up. I never want to see another tile as long as I live.
Can I have a margarita now...?

A note of thanks to my friend Adam for sparking this title with me.

#UsGUYS in Montreal.

2011-07-25T17:36:00.006-04:00

You know when things just click? The #UsGuys gang are a fast-paced Twitter stream of social medi-oids. This weekend, I got to meet some of them in real life!

Radio personality @997Dave was headed from Vancouver Island to Montreal. Seizing the day, SEO dude @Josepf and self-proclaimed Interloper @JennyHerner decided to come on up from Philadelphia and St. Louis respectively. Their plan? To début their jointly written beat poem, a tribute to Ginsberg's The Howl, for Dave, fellow Montrealer @MilasPage, and myself.

But Dave bailed on the dinner!

Somehow we managed to have too much fun. I brought my Wacom and drew right there at the dinner. Josepf attempted to make out with a parrot, and it tried to eat him. Jenny joined me in being demure and petite! Ok, she was much better at demure than I, but still...! The poem blew my mind. And Mila graciously organized this event and made everyone feel welcome. She also took the best photos including these.

Josepf did lose his head at one point....

...but I replaced it.

And here we are in the Carré St. Louis after lunch the next day - synergy and a fountain of ideas, (yet somehow still Dave-less).

I'm breathlessly impressed with the entire event. My face hurts from laughing and smiling so much. The conversation was truly sublime and seamelssly interwoven with tweets from #UsGuys following our antics online.

What are you thoughts on meeting people from the internet?

Chocolate AND Chippendales.

2011-07-22T14:43:00.000-04:00

"You should draw me with a chocolate smeared face surrounded by two (not one but two!) hott guys! Preferably naked. Or not. But they must be hott."

This was @EllieM72's inspired Second Prize winning entry in The Most EPIC Contest Evar. Originally these dudes were starkers (all danglies tastefully hidden though). But when Ellie first saw the art, she had a sudden realization.

"Oh dang it. Was gonna order mugs but how do I explain two naked guys to my girls?? :( crap"

So I covered them up with a cliché. Which only makes this drawing all the more amusing.

Don't you love watching bicycles go backwards?

My FAVICON.

2011-07-21T16:00:00.005-04:00

Do you know where you are?

I was reading about the "12 Most Common Mistakes New Bloggers Make" by Danny Brown and realized that I hadn't yet made a favicon.

"Hey JC! What the heck is a favicon?"

Folks, in plain English, a favicon is that thingie in the corner of your thingie.

Apparently a blog should have one to help it stand out. So people know where they are.

I made my favicon thingie here at favicon.cc
And I figured out how to get it into the corner of my thingie at BloggingTips.com

So....does it look like me?

TILE ...and ERROR.

2011-07-18T22:31:00.001-04:00

Some things just won't get done with the husband around. So as soon as he goes away for 6 weeks, I decide to re-tile the mudroom floor and the front entrance! YAY!
Assessment:

The vinyl tiles in the mudroom went down perfectly. Until I discovered that vinyl tiles shouldn't go in a mudroom. After gluing them down. And sealing them. And five coats of wax. Yeesh!
Assessment:

Bought concrete tiles for the front entrance. Discovered they were too thick for door clearance. Aw maaaaan....
Assessment:

Got NEW thin tiles for the front entrance. Laid them down and looking good. Went to mix the glue and discovered I have the wrong kind of sub floor for tiles in that room. Particle board is baaaaaad!
Assessment:

Need to add a layer of 1/4 inch ply, so I get a piece from the garage and lay it on top of the fitted tiles to check if I have door clearance. I do not. But I do have sticky black tar from the sheet of ply smeared onto my shiny new tiles.
Assessment:

Looking more closely at the bag of glue powder, the instructions say to only mix it with this other "special liquid". Never mix it with water. Totally what I was about to do. Do I have this "special liquid"? No.
Assessment:

I can actually do a lot of DIY. But I don't know if I can rip out a particle board sub floor & install a new plywood one. I'm not physically strong enough...and I'd prolly saw my hand off or something. You think sleeping alone in the Big Bed is bad? Try making Bed Angels with a disembodied hand. Or clapping. And who would draw this blog?

So I'm gonna throw in the towel. And the trowel. AND the TILES. I know when I'm beat.
Assessment:

It's all in your attitude, right? WRONG. That first Assessment was totally off. Now I hafta wait for the Huz to come back and fix all this.

I need wine to wash down the irony here. Let's drink!

6 Top Reasons To Avoid DIY.

2011-07-17T21:12:00.005-04:00

My DIY Extreme Home Decorating has taken a downward spiral! So here's my 6 Top Reasons To AVOID DIY if you are me!

It's time for a massage, a manicure and a glass of wine. GOOGLE+ here I come...!

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Cry BABY.

2011-07-16T18:28:00.000-04:00

I was just Skyping with my son, eldest daughter and husband over in England and I started to blubber. I had to end the call and just bawl like a baby.

I miss them so much. But I did this drawing and it made me laugh!

Two and a half more weeks 'til we join them. Until then, I'll be using his t-shirt as a hankie.

Biggest cry baby moment?

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Not My HUSBAND.

2011-07-14T00:03:00.005-04:00

Three weeks down and three to go. The bed is still waaaay too big.

This is the t-shirt he was wearing when I first bonked him* over the head with my club and dragged him into my cave. Twenty years ago.
*Yeah, that too.

I think this may be the longest we've ever been apart. Thanks for all the hugs from friends and followers...you guys got any other fun suggestions for making it through the night...?

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GOOGLE+ is getting BUSY.

2011-07-12T20:04:00.002-04:00

My First Day on GOOGLE+ went okay. But not everyone shared the experience.

Do you still need to be invited to GOOGLE+ or what? And will G+ become part of Klout's freaky algorithm? Are these questions that need answering?

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My First Day on GOOGLE+.

2011-07-11T21:37:00.000-04:00

My first day on Google Plus (G+) went something like this:

I did find a couple things to like about it. But can I afford to partition my already fractalyzed* brain into yet more subdivisions?
*Could be a real word.

Are you on G+ and what did you think of it?

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SURFING The Laundry WAY.

2011-07-10T15:34:00.006-04:00

We've all faced the never-ending laundry pile, right? Ugh.
But sometimes mindless chores can relax the brain and give way to beautiful images...a bit like meditation. Or hallucination, depending on how much laundry there is, heheh.

Winning Third Prize in The Most EPIC Contest Evar, gifted photographer Karin Hedetniemi wrote: "You should draw me as a girl surfing a galaxy ... a sparkling, mini galaxy. Because once I saw one while I was absently folding laundry." So here she is surfing the Laundry WAY, which is a bit like the Milky WAY, but without the milk. @karinhedet wins a t-shirt with this drawing on it and my thanks for her inspirational entry.

Do you ever see magic in the mundane?

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